Trivia We Don't "Deserve" an Exclusive Partner

[Kaplok Kaplok]

I am almost sure that this idea I will be putting forward would be rejected by many. Most people will deny that the reasons for their bad and failed relationships is the idealized, and toxic beliefs that they subscribe to: romanticsm.

When we enter relationships - due to the mistaken beliefs from romanticsm - we take it as a given that the partner we chose should be exclusively "ours." That their attention and affection should be focused to us, and a lot of times, to only us.

This is a wrong belief. Just like in a school, no one is entitled to a good exam result. That is only a reflection of what you have learned. And relationships before marriage is meant for learning. Which means, exclusivity is a given perk if, and only if you sufficiently convince someone to be life-long partner, through the things you learn in life.

We know it is wrong to leave a school just because they gave us a bad grade, and dismiss the school as a "bad school". We should also know it is wrong, that a partner unconvinced or not ready to be exclusive should be abandoned. Doing so will only bring about a cycle of failures and refusal to learn.

Don't get me wrong. I do believe that we should aim for a mutually exclusive partner. But to expect it as pre-requisite is what hinders us from learning from our relationships. Just like that kid who blames the teacher for his bad test results. We fail to accept the challenge of convincing another person. And sadly, subscribing to this wrong belief that "we deserve to be the only one", we fail to appreciate how special and beautiful it is to convince or be convinced by someone to be an exclusive partner.
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Thank you for reading.